Taraji P. Henson got candid with her audience about the “dark place” she was in during this global pandemic.
On part two of the mental breakdown episode of her Facebook Watch show Peace of Mind with Taraji, the actress sat down with co-host Tracie Jade and psychologist Dr. Lashonda Green to discuss the thoughts she had about taking her own life.
“I had a dark moment. I was in a dark place,” Henson confessed. “For a couple of days, I couldn’t get out of the bed, I didn’t care. That’s not me. Then, I started having thoughts about ending it. It happened two nights in a row.”
Even thinking about her son couldn’t pull Henson from her despair.
“[I] thought about my son, said ‘He’s grown, he’ll get over it.’ You know what I mean? I just didn’t care,” she said.
She felt herself “withdrawing” from her loved ones, and said she was thinking of getting the gun she had in her home safe.
Thankfully, telling someone helped the Empire actress find mental clarity.
“I’m talking to one of my girlfriends and I knew, I was smart enough to say, ‘I have to say it.’ Because a part of me was ashamed. I was like, ‘I don’t want them to think I’m crazy. I don’t want them to obsess over me or think they gotta come and sit on me,'” she recalled.
The Hidden Figures actress knew she had to tell someone.
“I felt like if I don’t say it, then it becomes a plan. And what scared me was that I did it two nights in a row. And the thoughts kept coming. Now I started thinking about how. At first it was like, ‘I don’t wanna be here,’” she said.
Dr. Green responded by talking about triggers and how to recognize some of the signs of a mental health episode.
Watch the full episode below to see how the term ‘mental breakdown’ is different for every person and how needing to be a ‘strong Black woman’ can be a pressuring term for many women, including Henson.
If you or someone you know is experiencing suicidal thoughts, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.