After decades of anger and bitterness, LisaRaye McCoy, her mother Katie McCoy and the actress’ daughter Kai addressed long-simmering family issues on this weekend’s episode of OWN’s Iyanla: Fix My Life.
The three generations of women met with spiritual life coach Iyanla Vanzant for several days of tear-filled family therapy.
“My mother speaks negatively into everything,” LisaRaye told Vanzant. “My mom, she makes me feel like that’s what I don’t want to be.”
The mother, daughter and granddaughter have all been in quarantine together in LisaRaye’s home during the COVID-19 pandemic. Katie said she’s so tired of the bickering that she sits in her room all day to avoid conflict.
Iyanla referred to the three women as the queen mother, the queen and the princess. The three were all respectful of the spiritual life coach, but deflected their anger at each other.
“This thing right here can go left real quick,” Iyanla said about the tense therapy sessions.
“Obviously we’re here because we know some type of change needs to occur,” Kai said through tears.
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Katie explained that her anger started as a child growing up in Mississippi.
“I got tired of picking cotton,” she said, adding that she left the South in search of a better life. She married Chicago businessman David Ray McCoy, and got pregnant.
Instead of finding happiness, Katie told Iyanla the marriage was terrible, her late husband constantly cheated, and there was a history of domestic violence.
“Night and day he was beating me like a child,” she said.
Yet Katie stayed with David until his death. She admitted taking her daughter along as she went to confront her husband’s mistresses.
“She knew her daddy was a damn hoe,” Katie said. LisaRaye responded, “What do I do about it now, mom? Can I buy you?” Katie grew more angry and fired back, “You ain’t got enough damn money to buy me!”
Iyanla appeared stunned by Katie’s outburst. “Some of us is lyin’,” Katie said. “It’s a lot that ain’t being said here.”
Iyanla turned the tables on Katie and pressed her as to why she remained in the marriage, prompting Katie to admit she stayed because of David’s wealth and their lifestyle.
David was killed by one of his girlfriends in 1988. LisaRaye said her dad’s death left her devastated.
“I was a daddy’s girl,” the actress explained.
Iyanla told the women David was manipulative and dishonest. But she said it was wrong for Katie to take her anger out on her daughter.
“It is inappropriate for you to make your daughter emotionally responsible for your relationship with your man,” Iyanla told Katie.
Iyanla then said David had pitted his wife and his daughter against each other, prompting LisaRaye to break down in tears.
Katie eventually admitted that she had anger issues and had passed them down to her daughter.
As the sessions ended, Iyanla said she didn’t have a “good feeling” about the situation and feared the women would fall back into their old habits.
LisaRaye appeared more upbeat. “How about a follow-up in six months,” the actress said. “Let’s see where you are,” Iyanla responded.
Watch a clip from the episode below.